Meditation#11 Negligences

Meditation#11 Negligences

This weekend has been an incredible roller coaster of emotions… My mother required a very serious surgery and from afar I felt like I was holding the world upon my shoulders, longing to let it go like a pendulum, but without the certainty that if I did I would be able to breathe easier. I confess I had not even thought about this week’s meditation, but when I saw its title: Negligences, once again the perfection of the Divine Plan forced me down on my knees.

Today my mother has not had a good day, she still has not been able to eat and experienced renal failure, but thanks to the outrage that my sister rightfully expressed, we found out that a group of five specialists never had the decency to predict that after the operation the information about her routine medications would be necessary for her recovery protocol and most alarmingly, a medication that must not be suspended suddenly was withdrawn with no regards to the tragic complications that irresponsibility could entail: summarizing; very costly negligences.

Medical negligences, as dangerous and lethal as the negligences that we are invited to reflect upon on our meditation for this week. It takes us back to the time when we were defenseless, and either due to lack of resources or attention on our caretakers’ part, we felt cold, hunger, discomfort, loneliness or pain, and perhaps our feelings of deprivation or insufficiency of might be in fact related to those negligences we experienced as infants.

The assignment is to forgive those oversights, applying the balsam of acceptance on those old wounds and using that very same pain in order to be more understanding with those who experience neglect in their lives, frequently, more severe and damaging than any we have experienced. Healing these old bruises and concretely, the feeling of lack, will allow us to reflect on the blessings provided by our current resources that allow us to fulfill our needs or conversely, communicate in an effective and clear way when we feel that our rights, needs or feelings are not being adequately addressed.

Brimming with gratitude I witnessed the situation in which my sister could be the agent that identified the need for alarm and triggered the search for a solution. I still am ignorant of the outcome of this unfolding ordeal in my life, but I hope to learn humility as I relent to depending on others in order to survive this difficulty, empathy with those who day by day feel neglected in one way or another and the growing conviction that thanks to each moment of cold, hunger or pain, we grow in humanity and we learn to feed from manna that flows from our own heart as we let go and become fully aware that it is not us who make the world turn, and that it truly does not rest on our shoulders.

With love and humility,

Lina.

Meditation #10 The Healing Touch of Human Hands

Meditation #10 The Healing Touch of Human Hands

This is truly a topic where life has revealed its secrets to me in powerful ways. It began when I volunteered as a teen at an adoption house. It was a setting where I was supposed to teach children to read and write, but something powerful drew me to the neonatal wing, where Sister Nora, who took me under her wing eagerly, told me that what those babies needed more than anything, was to be held. The ones who did not make it did simply lacked enough holding, caressing and human contact. I remember feeling so useful, so important, so loved, by holding those tiny bodies, some so light that they managed to hold no heat of their own, requiring the “kangaroo” treatment, being held close to my body and inside my clothing, in a ready-made pouch of love. Some of those babies had been left in plastic bags at the door of the adoption house, discarded like trash, but only those who were held survived. That is the power of the Human touch.

I also remember watching a movie that was brutal in its sincerity, “Life as a House”, in which a man with an illness of the soul more severe than his illness of the body was hugged by a nurse and literally dissolved in helplessness and relief, realizing how long he had not felt the power of human contact, how desperate, how utterly lost he had become without the warmth of a caring human hand communicating love to him.

Within the American culture, I was told not to hug too much or dare to touch my student’s hair, as they loved for me to do, since it could be seen in the wrong way. I grieved for a society where touch has become associated with threat, but life in its mysterious ways reminded me that Truth does not remain hidden for long. 

About three years ago, I was led to discover Reiki, the therapy that heals with human hands. I was told all about its ancient origins and its carefully detailed technique, and though I respect its method, at its core, I believe that its life-changing effects reside in the simple act of total surrender to other’s hands, to the healing energy provided by the will of someone who cares enough to touch your skin and desires to help you realign your body, your mind and your soul, reminding you that you are tremendously loved, important and unique. Perhaps what those hands are in fact doing is allowing us to rewind to those first months of life when we were held, touched and fed by the human hands of those who cared for us.

During this week, look back with gratitude in search for all of those who have fed your being with the magic of touch. There may have been pain in some of the contacts you experienced, but focus on the love you have received, the powerful embraces, the relief of holding a hand when you felt helpless, a kiss of delight at the sight of you, the group hug of good friends offering support, the invisible one offered by a voice in the distance or a message of care within the power of new media. Inhale this healing power and venture with your own hands to heal those who might need a hug, a kiss, a warm hand on their back, reassuring them you have their back and reminding them that you love them and can feed them with your powerful human touch.

With a hug and a kiss,

Lina.

Meditation #9 The Richness of Lack

Meditation #9 The Richness of Lack

Last week we surrendered to the river of our tears, and now we move on to the joy found within our infant hearts. We were fresh, like rosebuds. We were held wide open by expectation, by a permanent sense of awe, and an eager senses stance towards life and the world.

Yesterday, as I was kayaking, I was reminded of this intense excitement by a baby who waved enthusiastically as I rowed by. I had quietly been navigating up the river for at least an hour and many people had seen me from the riverbed, but no one had jumped up and down and squealed in delight when they saw me, only a baby could have done that.

I remembered how I had been confused frequently when I first came to this country and I continued to smile at everyone I saw and naturally, greeted fellow walkers or joggers spontaneously. I was befuddled because most did not return my greeting or looked taken aback, but now I am used to it and rarely acknowledge the people I encounter. But seeing that baby’s joy reminded me of the wisdom found only in little ones, the thirst for life and zest for every new experience that makes a baby shudder and stare upon the simple encounter of another first…

What a loss it is to atrophy the will to seek connection, to reach out and meet another human being. We are born with an intense desire to look into another human being’s face, to get lost in the features of another, connect with their eyes and explore their humanity. We bring gallons of desire, of interest, of will, curiosity and hunger and then life dulls our rainbow of intentions. Within our lack of distractions, things and preoccupations in early life, we were wealthy in intensity of feeling alive.

Let’s look back at that time before the fears, the doubts and the conditioning of social norms restrained our natural reactions to the thrills of Living.

Being human in totality of experience is our true career calling. I have often found this spontaneity of Being in people who seem to have very little in material possessions, such as the natives I met in the Amazon. They had no access to technology and our conveniences and comforts, but they had the luxury of presence, of community and of total surrender to the moment. They live fully committed to the experience of their here, their now: like babies.

The world had been unfolding for centuries before we joined it, and it will continue to spin around without us when we leave this terrestrial existence, but this life we have been offered is our opportunity to squeeze the fruits pertaining to being human. I challenge you to live each day like a baby, unpacking it like a precious gift, exhausting the possibilities of existence and realizing that by focusing in that richness of life, you will lose your fear of death and find the key to real wealth: a life with no regrets.

With love,

Lina.