Meditation#14 The Shedding of Selves

Meditation#14 The Shedding of Selves

I have always been fascinated by exoskeletons, whether those of the cicadas or the shriveled snake skins I found so often in the Amazon and Louisiana wilderness, or by the ones I have found on beaches, my treasured seashells.  Often, I have contemplated how even as the time passes and our children leave behind clothes, shoes and toys, these too are like armor that has been outgrown and discarded, requiring newer wardrobes to accommodate the growing bodies of manifold creatures. Nature seems to adapt and easily transform whether it be the growth of a bigger body or a completely new self in order to allow development and growth to continue unfolding. What then signals the need for a new soul, a bigger heart or a higher state of being when life seems to reach a new stage of existence?

In this particular meditation we are invited to reflect on the many times in life in which we have so longed to belong to a group, to be lost in the collective and feel like a cherished crucial part of a jigsaw puzzle. In early childhood, this becomes a particularly powerful desire as the transition from home into school allows us to observe how the others around us dress, play, talk and behave. Our immature selves were particularly eager to please and be accepted no matter what the cost or sacrifice we had to make. How many times we agonized about being the last to be chosen for a team or the one not invited to a party or to participate in a simple game and perhaps even about not having the right kind of clothes? How many times a kind gesture or a word saved the day, and opened a fold where we could be part of the group and feel included. The longing to fit in and be valued was very strong and if never understood and rationalized, it might make us obsess about fitting in and feel that we need to possess all kinds of things in order to feel worthy or accepted.

How often have we realized that when we dare follow our own hearts and make choices based upon our own individual tastes and preferences, this simple act reveals fascinating details about who we are? Have we developed enough certainties about who we are that our exoskeletons do not need to match the collective for us to feel comfortable? Can we defy the powerful pull of uniformity to dare to be different and shed the masks that hide our real selves? Can we remember with a grateful heart the people who welcomed us and helped us to learn to trust who we were in order to belong?

So often, our own attitude can be a catalyst or a blockage as to how the people who surround us decide to act, depending on whether we encourage them to feel free to reveal who they are in all sincerity, or if we carry the sword of our judgement and the shield of our criticism. Can we depose our fears and act with such spontaneity and genuine authenticity that we encourage others to be confident to be who they are, plain and simple, and excel at what the only assignment we are all expected to excel at: merely being our true selves, selves that are free to be shed and to evolve as the never-ending surprises of our lives unfold.

With love,

Lina.